December 30, 2010

reverb 10.30 : gift

This month, gifts and gift-giving can seem inescapable. What's the most memorable gift, tangible or emotional, you received this year?

This is too easy. Watching my son grin like a cheshire cat, from the tips of his toes to the top of his head. Tooth pain free. BooYah!

December 29, 2010

reverb 10.29 : defining moment

Describe a defining moment or series of events that has affected your life this year.

You know, that's kind of funny. In many of these reverb posts and actually in posts I have made all year are shining tidbits of the glory that is me.

The year started in trepidation as I risked my comfortable bubble and stepped back into the world. As it happens it was more a sashay and dive. Either way, this year has been all about grabbing life with both hands and riding the wave with the occasional attempt to divert it's direction to discover something else I'd lost along the way.

We had a familyy reunion in Sawn River this year and we had a family service in this teeny ancient little church (our family filled it) that family members generations ago had both built and served in. My Aunt Marg asked me to do one of the readings for the service, and it happened to be about oneness, by Thich Nhat Han. Not only was I honoured to be invited to do the reading, the subject was something I have been conciously practicing this year so it really resonated with me. It just seemed too conincidental not mean something. But of course it did. We are all part of everything, everything is in us. This year I had a multitude of moments where I was one with the universe. It may sound corny, but I only hope that you get that chance too.

It's life changing.

December 27, 2010

reverb 10.27 : ordinary joy

Our most profound joy is often experienced during ordinary moments. What was one of your most joyful ordinary moments this year?

Watching & listening to my grandkids Devi & Seth trying to keep their collective cool while wrangling over whose turn it was to sleep over at my place. They are my joy together and apart. All I need is to hear either of their voices and I have a better day.

But it's still super stupendous to feel that "wanted", and to know that they pay attention about communicating with each other. You should hear the arguements that they can marshall forth in defense of their desire for it to be "my turn".

I'm waiting for the day when one of them tries the bait & switch. I wonder if it will work?

December 26, 2010

reverb 10.26 : soul food

What did you eat this year that you will never forget? What went into your mouth & touched your soul?

I have a very intimate relationship with food. I don't believe I can share this with anyone yet. let me just say it was very tasty.

December 25, 2010

reverb 10.25 : Photo - a present to yourself

Sift through all the photos of you from the past year. Choose one that best captures you; either who you are, or who you strive to be. Find the shot of you that is worth a thousand words. Share the image, who shot it, where, and what it best reveals about you.

I shot this the end of the 8th day in Jamaica. January 2010.

It's the best because there I am - all of the little bits of lost pieces found and put together in one very transparent package. And I am bone deep happy.

How do you beat that?

December 24, 2010

reverb 10.24 Everything's OK.

What was the best moment that could serve as proof that everything is going to be alright? And how will you incorporate that discovery into the year ahead?

Well actually, everything may not end up being "alright", that's for the future to know and reveal to me once I get there. Sure they can be alright in the sense that you're still alive and the earth is still turning - but that does not mean that every thing is ALL RIGHT.

That said, I improvise & overcome and take it as it's served.

December 23, 2010

reverb 10.21 : Future self

Imagine yourself five years from now. What advice would you give your current self for the year ahead? (Bonus: Write a note to yourself 10 years ago. What would you tell your younger self?)

Hope for the best, plan for the worst. That way even the nasty surprises aren't quite.

dk. Do not let the words and actions of the people that you care about interfere with your life. They are opinions and perspectives and often not very thoroughly thought out. Trust your intuition. Sure you may be wrong sometimes but that's how we learn.

Do not shut off parts of your life because you are afraid of being hurt. Pain fades, wounds heal, and you won't have missed an opportunity.

reverb 10.23 : New name

Let's meet again, for the first time. If you could introduce yourself to strangers by another name for just one day, what would it be and why?

It would be sugar pants. "Hello, I'm sugar pants."
Can you imagine? That nomenclature seems to make a lot of people uncomfortable. It is sassy and not PC at all. I like when people are uncomfortable because their body language is so much more truthful.

The people that aren't uncomfortable are generally laughing with me.

December 22, 2010

reverb 10.22 : travel

How did you travel in 2010? How and/or where would you like to travel next year?

I went on my first winter vacation to a tropical destination by aeroplane. I packed everything but the kitchen sink. I didn't use half of what i took. Strange since I pack so well for camping. Remember - you may have to haul all that luggage fronmt the terminal to the transfer bus and then walk several blocks with it at the resort.

This year I'm traveling to the same place but waaaay lighter. Bathing suits, cotton dresses, shorts, a couple of tank tops, sandals, runners and a pair of heels, two dressup outfits (dressing for dinner). Minimal makeup - eyeliner, shadow and blush - that's it. 1 shampoo and 1 conditioner - no spray or straighteners mousse etc - there`s no point;) Basic jewelry. No pillows, towels, or housecoats but I will take my mini USB fan that runs off my laptop. Only 2 books. One hat. Only 3 pairs of shades. No big sweeater to the airport either, I`ll smoke in the car and brave the cold between the car and the terminal, hauling it through the aeroport later in 110% humidity is not to be done twice.

Better laptop/electronics/camera bag this year - easier to get things in and out, room for documents & a book, meds and my litre bag of 100ml bottles. Take sandwiches on plane.

Pick one touristy thing to do a week and otherwise relax.

Practice with skype BEFORE I go.

Park the car at the kids so if there's a snowstorm of epic proportions towing is not something you have to worry about.

Call the bank and the plastic keepers and tell them you're going out of country so they don't muck about with your authorizations.

Take your own alarm clock.

2 bottles each of sunscreen and moisturizer. (I ran out last time)

December 20, 2010

hey mom, miss you.

It's still like yesterday and forever away.
I awoke weeping, not knowing why until I saw the date on the calendar.
And it's a full moon.
Now I understand why I wanted to get floor licking drunk yestereve.

Your image in my mind's eye has been gone for a while but I carry you in my heart everywhere I go.

Amanda is getting married next year. Her dress is beautiful, she looks like a princess. The kids are hilarious. Devi's 10 going on drama 25, and Seth is an irascible 9. Stages. Chris is workin' hard and doing his damnedest to meet his responsibilities.

Murray has the most gorgeous smile and he's not sick all the time anymore. He's still dealing with an ulcer but even that is starting to heal up now. There's some positive stuff going on there and he's back to talking about school. He and Nola have been together over a year now, a little rocky sometimes but they're working through it, much like everyone else :)

Patty and I were laughing at you on her birthday, remembering when you were "visioning" your eyesight better and nearly ran me over with the truck.

Patty is finally getting the man she deserves. You'd love Jeff, he's a keeper. What's great is that he truly appreciates all that she is, and tells her. Patty is happy.

Liza and Brian are working on growing the biz & I think things are going well. Liza certainly seems happier.

All the kids are doing their thing. The Beez calls me KK now.

We had a family reunion in Swan this summer. It was glorious but would have been a million times better if you had been there.

Love you.

reverb 10.20 : beyond avoidance

What should you have done this year but didn't because you were too scared, worried, unsure, busy or otherwise deterred from doing? (Bonus: Will you do it?)

I'm thinking that I would have to say the big one was drop some more weight. This year I mostly concentrated on reducing my intake of processed foods, increasing the WHOLE foods and downsizing the portions. This certainly helped and I dropped 45 pounds since last January.


I know I need to exercise. And I have totally avoided it. I have taken short half hearted stabs at being more active and usually end up hurting myself in the process. But that's not why I avoided it. No matter what my "out loud" excuse was there are really only two reasons why I avoided it. The first is because I self sabotage (working on it) and the second is because I am lazy.

And I am perfectly aware of both of those flaws.
Will I do something about it you ask?

I have a plan.

When I get back from Jamaica at the end of January (I lost 20 pounds there last year in 2 weeks and I got into an active groove) I am joining the YMCA and I will waterwalk and swim, or even just walk walk - inside where there's no ice to wipe out on. But I will exer(shiver)cise a minimum of twice week, the aim is for 3-4 times a week by summer.

Look out 50 here I come!

December 19, 2010

reverb 10.19 : healing

What healed you this year? Was it sudden, or a drip-by-drip evolution? How would you like to be healed in 2011?

~ two weeks in a foreign country that felt like I had finally come home ~

Thank you Kory & Brenda for harassing me, in the nicest way possible, to join you on your annual pilgrimage to the sun.

dk got her groove back ;)

December 18, 2010

reverb 10.18 : try

What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn't go for it?

In the words of the great one

There is DO, or DO NOT. THERE IS NO TRY.

That said I did all kinds of new things this year because at the beginning I had decided to go back to my normal "risktaker" mode that I had put away several years ago in favour of "normalcy". It was an EPIC success. I ate new foods, went new places, broadened my horizons. I found some missing parts of myself, let go of some unneeded parts and redefined the rest, the miracle suit will have to do until I lose the rest of the unwanted bits;)

On the balance I also got hurt more but healed and grew stronger through the tribulations. I believe I lived this year growing and doing less damage to myself and those around me.

BTW, my mom always told me that "Try" is an "I don't want to word.

December 17, 2010

reverb 10.17 Lesson Learned

What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward?

You need to not listen to your own negative selftalk because sometimes you are SO convincing...

I no longer listen to ALL of the inside voices. I am being more discriminating and attempting to listen to only the positive ones;)

December 16, 2010

reverb 10.16 Friendship

How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst?

First let me say thank you to the 100 little gods for the plethora of friends that keep in contact with me. And honestly, sometimes it IS them keeping in contact with me - though lately it has been me keeping in contact with them. See saw marjorey daw... anyway - each of them has influenced change in me. That's what friends do.

Anyway, people change every minute of every day and as does one's perspective, though often you are not even aware of the process until the day you find yourself with your mouth open and words you never expected to hear from your own self. are tumbling pithily over your lips. wtf?

Then there's the epiphanous change ~ the instantaneous non-regulation burst ~ that usually scares hell out of several persons of interest, not the least yourself.

In my ongoing attempt at personal evolution, here is the list of criticisms my friends knowingly or not, laid down about me, that I have tried to be aware of and change (where I thought I should because some of these are just wrong) in 2010. Did it work? Only they would know.
I am always talking about me.
I am too hard on myself.
I should recognize that I am beautiful.
I think I am always right.
I am apparently, a religious bigot.
I am fat and unhealthy and will die soon if I don't do something about it.
(this originates from you need to exercise and watch what you eat)
I talk too much about my holiday.
I need to be in a relationship.
I'm too old to be hanging around with some of my friends.
I don't spend enough time with my family.
I should shut the hell up.
I take too many pictures.
I should dye my hair all the time to hide the white/grey.
I party too much.
I should take some more university classes.
I gossip.
I am always with the drama ...

Yup I think that's about it. While there is certainly some truth in there - it also raised a question with me. What or who exactly do these people see me as?

So in paying attention to my friends critiques I have to wonder if some of them are really my friends.

December 15, 2010

reverb 10.15 5minutes morphed to 15 minutes

Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010.

This year has so many memories that 5 minutes just won't cut it, which is but one of the many reasons I am such a camera freak. My friends call me the Archivist ;)

Thus and so:

The juxtaposition of the poshness of the resort with the paucity of choice in the market. FRESH blue mountain coffee. grilled lobster on the beach. tropical downpour. my connection with my planet, guess I'm not alien after all. the grandeur and the intimacy of the ocean. Kory & Bren, biff & SKD, Kerry & Beffie - Marguerita ville and Rick's - too much fun. crispies. airplane rides;) fluffiness. air so heady you can smell the jungle growing. curried goat & jamaican patties.

Deb finished her Diss! Taraarah boomdeay's 30th bday at Malibu's place!Losing my friend John. sworn in at Eagles. Lloyd. St Paddy's where the OHanlons crew migrated to the Abbey for $5 pints and a place where we could smoke without having to wait in line to get back in. Devi's 10th birthday - salon & limo ride. Brad's wedding. penis puppets with Anna. Mur & Nola's open house feed the masses party. Queen review with Stacy. Handsome Joe's 30th bday. Seth's first baseball team winning the City Champs. Castro. Davis Beach and the sanitarium. camping. Goldie's unicorn. Swan River reunion and getting to know Michael. fusion's new website. new teeth. Jase and Dave and wine. karaoke. Murray's new smile. booking my next vacation. painting stuff blue for dad. new clothes a smaller size. Amanda's sunday dinners and Chris' helpfulness.

Found old poetry and older pictures. Brent's 40th. sleepovers with the grands. Brenda running away to Hollywood. made new old friends. the Keg for my bday. lunch at the Creek with Amanda. all the new babies. Anarchy leaving us. Kevin's hardwood floor. Winnipeg with Kory to see Brenda,Solid Gold, Hooters and the crazy cast. grey cup. turning 49 ;)my new kitchen light and plans for kitchen in Feb 2011.

4 years of online journalling

Hmmm. So what does that actually mean to me? What do I get out of blogging? I don't have many followers, there aren't a ton of strangers popping by to read my words. I am not making any effort to induce them to pop by either, so what is it that motivates me to continue?

I like to see my words writ clear.

This is ever so much easier to read than my handwriting.

I have met some pretty funky people here.

I can ask big questions or little questions or generally rant on about my topic of the moment and none asks "Where's your inside voice?"

For those I don't see often enough, it's a way for them to keep current, much as I do when creeping their blogs.

It is an ongoing conversation with myself, and it's gfreat so long as not too many me's are trying to talk all at once.

Happy blogiversary!

December 14, 2010

reverrb 10.14 appreciate

What's the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it?

I appreciate those days where the universes come together in harmony and provide me with a pain free day. On those days I know I've trod the right path somehow.

I express my gratitude by living that particular day very well, staying in the moments as they are revealed to me.

December 11, 2010

reverb 10.12 body integration

This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn't mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present?

This is EXACTLY why I need to retire to Jamaica.I stepped of the plane and was HOME.

Immediate connection, not just body mind but body mind planet. The air was the right weight, every breath brought more life inside me, bathed in great sol's abundance, it tasted of home. Susurro of the ocean reflected in the sway of my step. My eyes widened and my skin drank in the richness. the stress string that ties the body in knots just slipped away.

And then I went out on the ocean. In a little wooden fishing boat about 15 feet long and 5 feet wide. The swell is taller than the boat and moves you. Once you integrate the oceanic groove with the woody vibe of the outboard, sunkissed skin and the burst of salt spray as you crest some cross chop - it just doesn't get any better.

It was freeing that ride. It was where I belonged right there, right then. I almost got lost there. No place in particular and everywhere at once. No need to speak, just lean back and let the wind clear my soul. Embraced by mother sea, knowing that every atom that was me was perfectly in harmony with every other.

Seared effortlessly into my heart - I need but to close my eyes and breath in just a little bit of quiet and I can take myself right back there. All connected.

the new kitchen textures

Update: Peter installed my kitchen light fixture today! YAY!!!! It has been sitting in my hallway 3 weeks shy of 2 years.

and it is now on the ceiling - with a dimmer for those days when you don't want to know about the spots on the stainless.

YAYYYY!!!!! Cupboards!!!!!to be installed in February 2011 - another great thing to look forward to :) thank you Brian - can hardly wait to see the plans.

reverb 10.11 things

What are 11 things your life doesn't need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life?

I don't believe I actually have 11 things in my life to get rid of, unless we are talking specific finite objects.
1. My extra weight. Fewer carbs, smaller portions, exercise => live better.
2. I'm sure half the stuff in the hall closet. Clean sweep time. For some reason I keep all the boxes that stuff comes in and I have a hard time letting go of jackets I no longer wear. Will allow me to find what I'm looking for in half the time and give me a place to stash my secret santa ;)
3. $$ stress. I have an appointment with a financial planner who will assist me in making my jamaican retirement dream come true resulting in no worries about my future so I can live more in today.
4. I know I need to quit smoking. I've reduced to a carton every 3 weeks. I'm not sure how I am going to stop completely because I don't really want to. But it's on the list. I'll be healthier, my insurance will cost WAY less, my clothes won't smell and that's $1560 I won't burn through. Strangely that's what my hotel costs for 3 weeks on the island. hmmmmmm.
5. Purposefully stupid people. I will have to stop thinking that they will - at some point - change their minds and get it together. Let 'em go. Less aarrgghh! for me.

If I come up with anything else I'll add it later.

December 10, 2010

Reverb 10.10 Wisdom

What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out?

I read the prompt and the only thing I could come up with was, "What IS wisdom?"

I have to think about this one . . .

The wisest decision that I made this year was to live my life as close to in the moment - every moment - with guts and gusto while welcoming risk with open arms.

There have been epic wins and some minor failures. I learned more about myself. I made new friends. I participated in more events. I was way less lonely. I am learning to find my outside shape as appealing as my inside one. I say "no" more often. I am more hands off where I should and more hands on when I want to. I have gotten more accomplished on the gotta be done list and shortened the bucket list.

But best of all I have acted compassionately more consistently.

December 09, 2010

Reverb 10.9 Party

What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010?

And back to the island I go ;) Wednesday at Margueritaville with BrendaKor, biff girl and Skinny Dave, theWolf, Beffy and DOC. OMG what hilarity ensued!~ Planted in chairs that kept sinking into the sand so that eventually you just crawled out of them or stayed where you were. 29 degrees on the beachfront with an ocean breeze (can't you just smell it),taking a dip in the ocean when you got too warm. Literally buckets of ice cold beer and good greasy bar food.

Making the server girls smile, especially when they brought around bottles for the customer shots - free pour directly down your throat. THE BEST sunset, and happy shiny people. Beats goin', no problem smokin',

Live music, fire dancers, magic Kerry in a grass skirt and "The best lookin' Canadian Man at Margueritaville Contest" - bwahahah - gloriously funny.

Then late night supper once we got back to the resort with jamaican patties and turkey - Brenda laughed so hard she almost had a drink come out her nose - I almost fell off my chair - and we all wobbled happily together back to our rooms for a nap until dawn.

December 08, 2010

Reverb 10.8 : Beautifully different

Reflect on all the things that make you different - and light other people up.

"Transparency" is my goal, like the original scotch tape. I don't hide my virtues or my flaws and I tend to stick to people. WYSIWYG - what you see is what you get. Though what you see is always a work in progress so you may be guaranteed that it will not be the same every time. In a world gone paranoid of personal security and identity theft I offer myself entire to everyone I trust upon meeting. C'mon - I'm instinctual and optimistic not a blind idealist - I know there are some untrustworthy strangers out there. I do profer them the opportunity to earn my trust. For those untrustworthy souls that I am familiar with, they know exactly how I feel about it.

"Laughter" I adore laughter. As Reader's Digest says It is the BEST medicine! And there simply is never enough of it. Laughter opens one to all the goodness happy joyous vibes in the universe and I think everyone deserves to get a little happy on. So I do what I can to induce that state even, occasionally, when it would be politically inappropriate but compassionately effective.

I LOVE to talk about the which is unproven;) Call them the 100 little gods/goddesses/deities/spirits/non-anthropomorphic expressions of the unknown. SO many people shy away from any discussion that is real, that touches what you BELIEVE, and yet I think that is one of the most interesting values an individual holds. It describes how they value things, it supports how they communicate, it determines the type of guilt they suffer through ;) I work very hard at staying open minded about other people's life path choices, though it has been pointed out to me recently that I have been denigrating christianity recently. For that I most heartily apologize. I have some personal bias there that bubbles up this time of year, though it isn't the fault of christianity per se, but a poor judgement call by one its authority figures.

I am a culture sponge. Describe it to me, feed me its food, let's groove to its music, revel in its art. Lets eat its literature and wraps ourselves its pattern and colours.

I am a bona fide geek of the first water who is a communicator by natural inclination and trade. Science and spirituality are my refuge. I am a 49 year old women with the wonder of an 8 year old child.

A slightly kooky sherman tank.

December 06, 2010

reverb10.6 : the last thing you made...

Well I cook - so I make a lot of things and I make a sincere effort at using whole foods (thank you son) and trying new flavours and textures to expand my palate. So the last seriously GOOD thing I made was Chili about 10 days ago. A ton of tomatoes, ground beef, white/yellow/red onions, celery, shredded carrots, mushrooms, garlic, brown baked beans/red beans/black beans (but no kidney beans I am still getting used to their texture), 3 or 4 red peppers, an orange pepper, a little demarra, lots of chili powder, Tabasco, Worcestershire, cayenne, paprika, hot sauce, Tony's creole spice and a handful of dried chili seeds. Man it was some delicious with just enough heat. Always better if you simmer for a day.

December 05, 2010

reverb10.5 : Let go.

What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why?

This year I have LET GO and double handful of thing but the most life changing would be a 4 decades old fear. I have been afraid of the dentist - not girly afraid - I mean a deep seated psychological terror inducing anxiety attacks and projectile vomiting - and that is before I even SIT in the chair, since the age of 12. I turned 49 this year.

Induced by a catastrophic visit to the dentist at a tender age and I am sure exaggerated by my oh so vivid imagination, i avoided that chair with every ounce of will power I had. The only way my new dentist would deal with me was to put me completely out and do the work so that I woke up with it all done. I could NOT sit in the chair without moving and crying and OH! what a to do. The sound of any kind of drill would occasionally paralyze me.

At 18, during my first pregnancy, the majority of the enamel on my teeth flaked off. Time for dentures the dentist said. So I went through the process - anesthetized - but only did the tops. (my mom always told me the bottoms were the worst and to hold onto them as long as I could - (though I seriously doubt she meant for me to go as far as I went)

Anyway, by 30, the bottoms were an "issue" ragged jagged, cracked and the abscesses started. By 40 I had learned not smile while showing the bottom teeth and regular would nick my tongue on the sharp edges in the back. It wasn't good. I would get an abscess in the same spot about every 3 months and my face would swell and my eye would go black and blue ..... yada yada yada. Antibiotics and lectures from my doctor to no avail. AT 42 I HAD TO REPLACE MY TOP DENTURE AND i WARNED THE NURSES OF MY FEAR - WHICH THEY POOH POOH POOHED. Mistake on their part. There wasn't even any pain involved just the whole impression process but I was F_R_E_A_K_E_D right out. At one point I thought I was suffocating and I| think I sacred one of the kids in the open spaced dental room that they wouldn't get back in the chair. Suffice it to say that it was not a happy day.

Then I had problems with the new plate. Teeth kept breaking off, it had a weird overbite and it felt like it was too big for my mouth. I tried to discuss it with the dentist who had them made and they just gave me the cold shoulder once they had my $800. Every time I had to get the plate fixed it would cost me $40. At one point two teeth broke off on a Thursday at 4 in the afternoon and I had to leave town for a family gathering the next day - a holiday so the denturist was closed - and through a process of elimination came up with my own solution: the toughest waterproof crazy glue Canadian Tire had. Be damned if it didn't work perfectly. For years.

At 45 I had decided that I really needed to get the bottoms pulled. I had a low grade abscess all the time in one tooth, pieces of the teeth were breaking off, it tasted so bad - all the time. I had a dental plan - I needed to look after myself and use it.

I started to make dentist appointments. In 2 1/2 years I made 8 appointments with 8 different dentists and actually made it to the parking lots of 2 of them.

This year, with a recommendation from several of my friends, mojo in hand, I made it inside the dentist's office for a consultation. White knuckled, fingers leaving grooves in the edge of the reception desk the nurse asked if I was okay. I almost turned and ran. Instead, tears dripping down my face I looked at her and said, "I am so afraid - just the smell makes me sick." And instead of putting me down or outright laughing at me - as others had done - she said "no problem we'll get this done as quickly as possible and see what we could do to make it less traumatic." And she did.

Arrangements were made, I had 2 months to get myself ready for game day and my lovely new dentist used anesthetic right in the office to make me stupid but not comatose. I went in on torture morning relatively calm, went to sleep and the next thing I knew I was being woken up and all 14 teeth were gone in an hour and a half. After that experience my visits to a GREAT denturist were a piece of cake.

Today I have a great smile, no more abscess, and fear be gone.

December 03, 2010

Reverb 10.3 : Moment

There have been so many.

January 20, 2010 - the 4th day of my first out of North America winter holiday. Negril, Jamaica. I found the misplaced pieces of me - an excerpt from my journal: "I started to sing inside and out, whenever the mood took me, do a little two foot shuffle as I crossed the lounge just for the sheer joy of it. Body size started to matter only when it became an inconvenience like a narrow chair or a ladder. My bounce was back. I quit taking everything except my vitamins and felt even better. When complimented I said thank you instead of looking at my feet and mumbling something unintelligible. The chin came up and so did everything else, I felt taller."

and my lingerie matched ;)

the Bleekly :

Hah! So much for NaBloPloMo. Today is brought to you by the word "blog" recombinated with the word "week", new word for me. the Bleek, the blog I apparently cannot find enough time to update - except for once a week, and even that limit is fairly flexible dependant upon what adventures have launched since the last Bleek.

This week has been full of fun and frivolity and an attempt to make my Visa blush by using it like a Times Square hooker.

I have managed to purchase all of my santa presents except 2, I used my work technology loan to purchase a new Canon Rebel with both the 18-55 and 75-300 telephoto lens along with 2 new 500G free agent go drives (love 'em - size of a pack of smokes and they need no external power source), the dotter's wedding gown has been shipped and is on its way from TO, an anticipated package from Ghunzang post office is on it's way to me via Vancouver, and the ThinkGeek box got here Wednesday last.

I spent a lovely evening out with the dotter looking at shiny things and of course could not walk away without something ... but this time it was for me. A lovely pale green and purple jade buddha that simply called me over and said "hey, why am I still in this case?". They gave me 20%, wine, munchies and flowers ... yay!

My toes are all pretty and pink with sparkly flowers care of my Pixx and the deadends are long gone from the white/grey/brown/red curls gracing my vanilla latte fake baked bod. Me & the colour god have a meeting in late december about 2 weeks before my escape to warmer climes. I'm thinking a nice warm golden brown.

Thursday opened the door to the weekend madness with tequilas all around and 10 little wings for supper. Pints with the eagles crowd and forward ho to the Hub where - somehow - the Patron showed up for Minda Sheri & I and thank you brother for the ride home. Sorry for forgetting to put your hat & gloves back in the truck.

Of course my need to feel included reared it's monstrous mug once again as evidenced by my subconscious effort to join the Biff girl club when I managed to get across the street, up the stairs, and into the condo before I tripped - hands full of gift bags including the schmancy new camera - and did a lip stand in my hallway. Whacked the fireside bench with my face as I laid myself out head to toe on the hardwood. Timmberrrrr! And rolled around for 10 minutes laughing at the absurdity of it all until the cheekbone started to complain. holy mother. The knee didn't pipe up until Friday morning of course.

I got to spend several hours dallying over a lovely nuncheon with the pretty girl catching up and laughing and being picky about walnuts. Our little side trip to XLS cargo was fruitless but I believe I have inherited a couple of winter jackets - yay!

Met the boyos at the pub for pints and Dave called shenanigans. Once we managed to take over the big table it was decided that wine at my place would be much less expensive if not less crowded and the next leg of Fraturday ensued. With a condofull of people - 10 or 11 - most of whom had never been to my place before - we cranked on some tunes and yakked about everything from god to art until about midnight at which point privacy was abandoned for the heavy bass of the dance groove at the barbar. Needless to say it was a late night ;)

Saturday was family day. Decisions were made for Boxing Day christmas dinner at Dad & Viv's in the Jaw along with much razzing of the seester and her building block lego sheds to make her 2200 sq foot house for $50k. I bet it'll work. Brian agreed to get the drawing for the kitchen done, and Amanda and I inherited some more clothes for her/Devi/Me. The roads were so smushy I almost got stuck leaving her place to get the groceries I'd forgotten Friday.

Then it was boot it back to my place to take some semi-formal pictures of the PattyJeffness - which turned out smashing by the way - with my new camera. Out for dinner with the crew and then watched a couple of old black & whites with the footsies up after I finished making the mmmm stuffing for tomorrow's turkey and cloved demarra glaxe for the ham. It's gonna be delish I tells ya.

And then Grey Cup day dawned a little crispy and the flatlanders hopes were burning bright. Off to Skinny Dave & Biff girl's place with Kory who won the turkey & the ham we're cooking, Minda's doing the marguerita's with my El Jimador,and Dave's organizing the seating. An old time get the families together Grey Cup party. The food was excellent, the company hilarious and the game ... well not so much. I thought the riders did a fair good job win or lose - but then what do I know, I'm a Bombers fan ;) It was kind of nice to have company.

Monday it's back to work - still lots of things to get done on the todo list - but isn't there always!

happy santa y'all

December 01, 2010

Reverb 10.1 : One Word

I've always been about the vibrations - the whorls and eddies created in the current of the planetary chi. I believe our intent as well as our actions create movement in the multiverse and this idea that Schmutzie found fits in rather well. I'm not likely to do one everyday, more likely I will act on those that move me ;)

The first one is a gooder:

ONE WORD that encapsulates all of your experience for 2010 - and explain why.
Then ONE WORD that you look forward to encapsulating the entirety of 2011 once you get there.

2010: risktaker
Epiphanies and dirges infected my year like chickenpox in a daycare. And at almost every step I did NOT take the safe road, as I have been doing low these many years. I ACTED instead of just dreaming or considering or talking. Yes I had some epic fails but I had more epic successes. Lesson learned: LIVE your life.

2011: Well-lived
To put into practice what I learned this year on a daily go forward basis.

improvise & overcome

... and why would I choose to associate myself with a term that most used used in a derogatory manner?
In order to change the meaning of a word or create a new meaning for a word, one must own the word. Over time and use the word may evolve to mean other than was originally intended & to that end...
my definition: an independent woman

dictionary definitions:

1. informal term for a (young) woman
2. an unsupervised umarried woman
3. a young woman or girl, esp. a peasant girl.
(usually facetious)
3. a woman servant
4. a wanton woman
5. Archaic: a strumpet
[Origin: 1250–1300; ME, back formation from wenchel, OE wencel child]

synonom :"dame"

Women Entitled to Nothing but Complete Happiness

International Wenches Guild

what do you believe?


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