wenchwire

change is eternal ... and this time tis bittersweet. my boy/man/youngest child is movin' out on his own at the end of this month. i find myself swinging between joy at having a space of my own and trepidation because except for 6 months in 2002/03 i've not lived alone for 30 years. mind you i was just fine in a few days, when he moved to Banff some other members of the homely crew.


i am attempting to displace the mommy losing her baby crap (i mean c'mon - he's 24 for goodness sake) with all the positives that will come from the changes descending on me. i am welcoming the new lifespace we will both have. perhaps we can recover the friendship that has been so strained the past year. he is tired of living with mom and mom will be happy to have a break from the homely crew. the silence will be weird, but this time i have my faithful harmonic radiators, each of which sings a descant of slightly different pitch than the other ( 7 of them ). add to that my singing floor (100 year old hardwoods) and i'm sure i'll be fine.

i will certainly miss my friend and the occasional hug & his singing along with the computer, and his penchant for arguing just for the sake of arguing (though this does occasionally drive me bats, but the apple doesn't fall far from the tree). oh yes - and the more practical things he gives me a hand with like grocery, garbage, and laundry haulage ( i live on the second floor & the laundry is in the basement) and replacing the light bulbs on my 10 foot ceilings. i will worry, but that's what mom's do.

my daughter has family dinners every Sunday, so i'll see him there when i drop in at least once a month, and we have already made plans to have dinner every couple of weeks on his day off. surprisingly enough even though he has left before it's just harder to see him go the second time, probably because i don't think he'll be moving back. i won't miss the mess in the kitchen or by the computer, tripping over shoes or the many phone calls that aren't for me (especially in the wee hours of the morning) but i do hope he and the homely crew drop by once in a while for a chat over coffee. i know i'm just being maudlin and will be quite happy to have only myself to blame if the house is messy or the dishes aren't done .... but still.

it seems like so many things are changing or maybe i have just decided that if there's a BIG change happening maybe i should implement everything all at once and only have to go through this crud once. so my girlfriend Carrie and i start belly dancing lessons on the 20th, i plan to stop smoking October 1st (maybe earlier but i doubt it) which will give me a month before Deb moves in and there's already have a "no smoking in the house" rule. i've re-inflated the yoga ball and will reintroduce myself to that. back to the healthy regimen where it comes to food, carbs and cholesterol. i am still clean sweeping the condo and reducing the "things", though my daughter said i shouldn't get rid of ALL my "stuff".

the TO DO list is getting longer. access to an electrician has sort of fallen into my lap so i am getting new light fixtures in the spare room, the office and the kitchen and 2 loose light switches tightened in early October, so at least those will come off the list. then all i need to do is finish Deb's dress, fix Mur's hoodie, replace/restore the kitchen floor, get the new sinkbase installed and a new back splash built for the wall taps,and get the viruses off my computer.

and it's not like i'll be alone long ... one of my best friends Deb is moving in at the end of October. we've lived together before so we know it works well. we like the same kind of music and share a cross section of friends, we both have adult children and enjoy similar after work entertainments. the financial benefits certainly won't hurt either, i might even get my kitchen cupboards by 2009.