March 24, 2008

trepidatious ...

Why can I not find a single thing to wear on my first day back to work (BIG YAY) in 2 months? I have all the same clothes I had when I went off work. I weigh only 7 or 8 pounds lighter - which is nothing. I have included some spring themed wardrobe pieces put away for the winter of which my friends remind me, I mostly missed the worst (little yay.) I am not happy with any of my choices. This is probably fall out from too many episodes of waht not to wear. Pant or skirt, hmmm visions of razors, we'll go with pants. Jeans or dress pants, jeans are warmer and it's still a little chilly out there and it does take me a little longer to walk to work. Now... blouse, t-shirt, sweater, hoody or jacket? Too many choices and I realized through the hunt that I need A. a new bra B. a new pair of jeans and C. new walking shoes. AND a haircut. Just where did I put that money tree?

Why on Thursday last when I had figured out what I would wear, did I not realize A,B & C?

This would be one of my reasons for needing to get back to work. Staying at home you become rather insular, you lose grip with current events and get lost in the round of day to day housework and grocery lists and appointments etc. I feel like my brain has been sort of in a holding pattern at too high an altitude. But my knee feels pretty good.

So I want to go back to work, yet at the same time time I worry if I will be able to keep up. Something has snapped. It's like someone created a slow leak in the "passion for life" tank and the gasket goop I've been applying is just not cutting the mustard. I never felt a lack of confidence about my job before. The job hasn't changed. My skills may be a bit rusty but they're there. WTF?

so right now I am trepidatious.


Schmutzie said...

When I was off for two months after my surgery last summer, I watched far too much "What Not To Wear", and then when I went back to work, my wardrobe looked like it belonged to a person far less fashion savvy than I believed I had become.

Don't worry if it is hard to keep up at work for the first while. Both the Palinode and I experienced the difficulty of thinking in ways we were no longer used to. Give yourself time.

dk said...

Exactly. Now I only have to convince myself of it. heh heh.

improvise & overcome

... and why would I choose to associate myself with a term that most used used in a derogatory manner?
In order to change the meaning of a word or create a new meaning for a word, one must own the word. Over time and use the word may evolve to mean other than was originally intended & to that end...
my definition: an independent woman

dictionary definitions:

1. informal term for a (young) woman
2. an unsupervised umarried woman
3. a young woman or girl, esp. a peasant girl.
(usually facetious)
3. a woman servant
4. a wanton woman
5. Archaic: a strumpet
[Origin: 1250–1300; ME, back formation from wenchel, OE wencel child]

synonom :"dame"

Women Entitled to Nothing but Complete Happiness

International Wenches Guild

what do you believe?


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