blogging for a year review:

change is eternal ... La diva's ideas for a year in review: go back into your backlog of blogs and use the first sentence from the first post for each month of the past year. . .

Jan - zippity doo dah day, roll over and bathe in the wash of sunshine on buddha gold walls, warm happy safe. bronchitis battle rolls on, with me mostly losing.

Feb - 2nd: I can see a light at the end of the tunnel, got caught up on my daily tasks yesterday. though I know there are several letters that will claim my attention this morning; I may yet get to some of the project work I have planned.

Mar - the 3rd of the 3rd: okay then, was back to work this week - and glad to be there, people starvation had set in solid.

Apr - 20 sentences, my friend abigail found this interesting idea on Saviabella's "blog, inspired ~ she wrote her own list. devi turned 7 and Charlie was born - 1st of the homely crew babes.

May - Abigail has an inside track on 5 question interviews for bloggers. seth turned 6 and camping May long at Sherwood.

June - the 5th: holy crap it's June and May whizzed past me ... as did June. working the 3 day week plan for summer with my vac days on Mon and nonDO firdays - worked great.

July - camping was such a release. weather was great - thank the hundred little gods for the patio. reading the bright yellow book from Cody - was very hard not to just fling it away.

Aug - the 3rd: the famdamily was of to the EX Wednesday afternoon - thought we'd take advantage of the cooler weather 28-29 and the breeze that was blowing. the dead celebrity party was a riot alice.

Sept - actually the 4th : sorry i haven't seen you in a bit, it was labour day longweekend which is the girl's ritual weekend away at Lu's camper in Sherwood Forest. bellydancing started & i'm lovin' it!

Oct - me knee has learned a new language. after a 5 day week that was just go gadget go - it really shouldn't have surprised me that there was a fraturday nite abourning in this last weekend of September; the ladies auxilliary was out in full force - and some of the members we hadn't seen in a while also arrived. Later on in the month we had a lovely triple birthday costume hallwe'en party at the House Of Pain.

Nov - It is the 1st of November and the boy has most of the boxes moved, just the big furniture to go now and he'll have that done today .... well the last of it was out by the end of the month and for the first time since I was 16 there are no piles of kids stuff anywhere ;) Katie's 19th bday was celebrated in high style with formal wear at the pub.

Dec - from the 2nd : curtis birthday friday was a blast. The O'Hanlon's Ladies Auxillary meeting of the broads party was a lovely chaotic crush. pre-christmas in moose jaw was terrific with potluck, and santa eve & day were spent in a lovely relatively quiet family christmas with my kids and grands. Boxing day at the pub saw quite a few of the crew too.

result: i figured i made entries on the 1st exactly half the year. not too shabby at all. i didn't whine too much. i like lists. i have been late on my "5 on the 27th" 1 out of 4 times... i don't beat myself up as much as i used to. i have loads of friends. my life seems to be going in a different direction than last year. all i can do is hope i didn't take a wrong turn and enjoy the ride.

if you get a chance sometime just after midnite - say this phrase: om mani padme hum
namaste

5 on the 27th #4 ~ just a tad late

beautiful eyes and a great smile ~ tall, old enough to pull at the LB. a captain no less, and a car. strong and gentle and good - great family reputation and a steady part time job - my parents loved that i was going out with you (they swallowed the fact that you were 3 years older because the other options were simply not to be considered). you were dependable and romantic and a good kisser. but you were in the end, a small town boy and i was trouble on two feet. i apologize sweets, you were my boy next door and i was the delinquent braless flag you waved at your parochial parents when they pissed you off.

you were my guilty pleasure, my secret hideaway. early mornings redolent with the mouth watering aroma of fresh baking and warm sugar glaze as i took that first big chomp while the glaze was still dripping. ripping down the highway in your 65 mustang coupe - as fast as we could go and careening to a stop so that we could make love in a wheatfield (take a sturdy blanket)... the first time you let me drive the Kawy - man - that was huge!!! the original chevy van with the orange shag keyhole & the minifridge for my strawberry angel. you really should have seen the look on my mom's face when she found my riding leather - the one with all the fringes you got me - i think she would have been okay if i hadn't told her how really old you were when she guessed wrong. what a rotten child i was, but then that's why you loved me. ditto.

i never did fit into the societal structure. at 16 i needed to be needed. you needed someone. married at 16 & 18, in spite of them all, we set out to make our own little family that would just love us for who we were. though i never regret my children - man were we stupid. what did we really think we were doing? did we think? hindsight being 20/20 we might want to have waited till we grew up a little before imposing our craziness on our kids. they are turning out great though, in spite of us ... it's always circles isn't it?

heat. we danced close and closer all night, with the barbies gaping in disbelief when you ignored their attempts to snatch you away. sunglasses at night. so tuned to the vibe my knees were trembling and you asked if i had a shower at my place. i did ;)

you lifted my heart and dissappeared me down the rabbit hole. our mutual obsession for 5 years & soul love by bowie, shades by iggy and most of the pistols carried us to faraway places. mushrooms, spandex, heavy metal and an endearing curiosity. you were the penultimate peter pan and though i never realized it i was wendy and her brothers all twizzled together with a sprinkling of peter's boys just for the explosive effect. bring on the hook - he cannot prevail because we are invincible!
but we were wrong. i started to grow up and you left me for someone who would share your happy place without question. idol, medora, the trainride ~ treasured memories all. you are my heart friend and i miss you.

the year of overcoming entropy

this has been a tumultuous year for almost everyone i know. small defeats and large miracles. looking back it has been all about the importance of moving forward.

look back all you want, but do not get stuck there. just because reality is "blahblahblah" today, does not mean it has to stay that way. if you do nothing to change it/yourself/the situation - it will maintain or devolve into something truly horrendous.

if you choose to make a positive effort, great or small, change will occur. the outcome is never guaranteed, but at least you are choosing. enough of the pushme-pullyou indecisiveness of modern wo/man.

take a fucking stand.

this year i had a double handful of friends who persevered made a change or took a stand. palinode for his health care. abby for her dignity. schmutzie for her femininity (no - really baby - unknowingly or not you did) savia for song. patty & deb for their mental health. brad for not smoking. asi for daddyhood. katie for adulthood. nick dee & gio for family values. rod for self reliance. at least 6 people who refused to be doormats. laurie for daily idependence. the Wrocks for committment. mur for growing up & out. pixx for her kids and her refusal to let the system throttle her, mandy & chris for plugging through the daily grind, everyday - together, and chedly for allowing himself the time to heal. bren for self image, kory for his health and carrie for her fitness.

to all the people around me who make the little and big changes, hard as they may be.
THANK YOU.

this year I learned to be comfortable with the word cunt. thanks for the book cody!

onward

it's christmas eve

it's christmas eve -
time to down-a-few-pints and get-up-and leave

i'll take the buuus - to the dotter's hoooouse
sneak in the doooor - quiet as a 300 pound mooouse...
the kids will squeeeeal with chiiildish gleee -
and jump up and down on my wounded knee ....

it's christmas eve
it's christmas eve... and i love every min - ute of it!

to everyone i knw, and those i have yet to meet - a happy santa season!!!

fun with cheese

after many requests for recipes from the meeting of the broads - here goes:

Cheese Ball
Ingredients:
2 pkg 500g cream cheese 1/2 small white onion diced fine
1 Tsp worcestshire sauce 1/3 red pepper diced fine
1 Tsp lemon juice 10 twists of ground black pepper (coarse)
1 Tsp Lime juice 1/8 C parsley flakes
1 C shredded cheese - (monterey jack or an jalapeno mix is tasty)
1/2 C cashews ( put them in the coffee bean grinder/food processer and crush fine - or you can always beat hell out of them with a rolling pin)

Instructions: Cream ingredients together, shape into ball.
Roll in crushed cashews ( or other nuts of choice - never mind ...).
Options: add nuts, hard chopped fruit, different peppers, dill, crab, other seafood, ham, etc.

Spinach Dip
Prep time: ½ hour
Ingredients:
2 pkg frozen spinach thawed & drained 2 C sour cream
1 C mayo (miracle whip for tang) 1 pkg Knorr cream of vegetable soup
1 can water chestnuts finely chopped 3 green onions finely chopped
1 C cheddar or marble cheese grated ½ sm red onion finely chopped
2 Tsp dill (optional) 1/8 C chopped fresh parsley parsley
1 Tsp worcestshire sauce S&P to taste
1 or 2 loaves of unsliced pumpernickel bread 3 sticks celery chopped fine
Options: shrimp, crab, bean sprouts, shredded carrots, lemon grass, tarragon, garlic

Instructions:
Mix all the dip ingredients together and chill at least 3 hours
Slice top off load and cube, hollow loaf out and cube interior, slash sides of loaf 2 inches deep
Fill slashed loaf with dip, and arrange cubed chunks around base. chop up extra bread you'll need it. Nan bread and pita bread in wedges work well for displays.

mmmmmmm.... cheezey goodness

the saddest day

15 years today ... my world stopped, i couldn't breathe, i couldn't speak, mind numbing terror and anger and loss. my mom was gone. i was empty.

15 years and it's like it was yesterday and a million years ago.

i love you mom.

on the 4th day of christmas

my true love gave to me -

Four fro-zen fingers (do not drop a smoke in a fluffy snowbank as the hand heat will get it wet)
Three winter coughs
Two wobbly feet
and a set of dead lights in my tree.

the OLA doubleD party was a roaring success thanks to all those who stopped by and hugs to those who didn't make it. it made me realize how much i love to entertain. and i now know the seating volume comfort limit of most of the rooms in our place. living room 12-14, office 6, bedrooms half a dozen, kitchen 2, smoking deck 5-6. At one point there was just about 30 people there. lovely lovely lovely.

y'all just made my week.

on the 1st day of christmas ...

my true love gave to me ...

a dead set of lights in my tree.


... and right at the top no less! like i needed to add another to do to my not t'done list.

so today is holy crap i have to get all of this done today day. i was woken up by a call from my sister at 7:45 on my day off with bad news about a friend, my unfulfilled wish that the problem with the happy lights would magically disappear slapped me upside the head (you'd have toknow how anal i am about the tree to understand the true depth of that particular tragedy), 10 time consuming tasks that absolutely must get done today and a cheery good morning from the head cold i have been avoiding for the past two weeks.

on the upside, it is my day off, a couple of friends have promised to give me a hand with the list and minilights are cheap.

wish me luck, it'll be off to wallymart later.

and a most magnificent happy birthday in absentia to aurthur guinness.

thursday

AAARRRGGGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

sloggin through the murk

i know i was productive this week but it certainly does not feel that way.

my heart goes out to a couple of people who are dealing with relative trauma (sending all good thoughts) and unspeakable loss (just keep going forward). thank the hundred little gods for my sorta stable family of the moment.

it's probably just reaction to the first week of real cold and OF COURSE with the weekend coming on it looks to get colder -28C tomorrow at least - before the wind. sounds like a good night to stay in, finish up the christmas cards and get some of the resents wrapped. think i might stack the candles in the fireplace and pretend.

was at the screening of 2 new films this week. certainly amusing (i love irony) a fair bit of tongue in cheek juxtaposed with supper 'en cheek and followed by cheeky villeins and a bit too much vomiting chicken for my taste. loved the gypsie schmooze. but it WAS FUNNY and an evening out with the girls is always a good time. strangely enough i knew one of the actors, and one of the actors' moms.

regina is such a small tiny insulated little place ... why am i still here?

i didn't lose it!!!!

i won a solid sense of self satisfaction at a small job well done - most days - even if i didn't win anything from the nablopomo prize list.

i didn't lose the lens camera from my "oh my god are you an idiot for spending that much on a camera" camera. my friend la schmutzie picked it up when she saw it adventuring among the pint glasses ans has saved me a trip to look for it in person.

i didn't lose my sangfroid when the tools at 4 separate computer stores treated me an ID10T problem before they even spoke to me.

i didn't throw my poutine with the frozen FROZEN cheese curd and broken plastic tine at the malignant tumours that were manning the tills at A&W saturday at lunch time, and after waiting 20 minutes and watching 6 or 7 other people get served i decided enough. i asked for a refund for my poutine which had yet to arrive - "oh here it is now that you're at the till and already done your burger and coffee" and lo and behold - not one of the 6 people behind the counter knew how to refund a single item, so they refunded my for my poutine, drink & burger. so i also won my lunch (looking for the positive here).

which reminds me I owe my sister $5 for the greycup game.

and today i won the "you are the best grandma in the world" award which i will collect on santa morning from my devi when she sees that i found her an $#@#^@#^@@^$@^@ - it's a secret and she's a smart little cookie...

sunday morning/lunch

curtis birthday friday was a blast. i was so happy to see so many of the crew that don't make it out too often, even my seester- i still have to process all the pics though.

spent sat afternoon with my friend Renee, we'd found the laptop she wanted friday am, but hadto wait till the shipment came in on Sat. we got to the store - still not in ... heavy sigh. we'll have to go back later this week.

lots of art and glue and glitter with wax paper snowflakes and the grandson. we watched a movie, had pizza with no green peppers and he had pop and pudding and applesauce. we stayed up till 11pm cuddling in the big chair and had a very good sleep. yogurt and grannysmith apples for breaky - pizza for snack, and lipton's chicken noodle soup for lunch. we've done the dishes and vacuumed and he has beaten me at 2 games of itsy bitsy spider, though i did redeem myself by winning frustration.

then it's off to his house to make paper bag reindeers and my daughter is making sunday supper.

gotta love the weekend!